Be Nice!

I have a very difficult time saying nice things about myself. I've called myself fat and discusting when I was 112 pounds, 150 pounds and 180 pounds. I don't say it because I want someone to say "Are you kidding?! You look fabulous!" or "You are NOT fat and discusting! You are beautiful!". I say it because that is how I think of myself. Mean, huh? I am my worst critic, my biggest bully, my meanest advisary. When I look in the mirror, I am 100% confident that the person I see starting back at me, inspecting me, picking me apart, is not the person who you see. When I'm stressed or nervous or unsure, the mirror adds extra curves, extra width, decreases height. When I want to look my best, the mirrors around me turn into fun-house distortions.

Why are we so mean to ourselves? If we saw another woman saying the same things we say to ourselves, to someone else or to a child, most of us would say something. Most of us would stand up for the person who was being harrassed. Yet, we say cruel things to ourselves every single day. We degrade ourselves and lower our own feelings of self worth. It has become such a part of being who we are, of being a woman, that we don't even think about how mean we're being to ourselves. We can brush off a million nice comments with just as many "reasons" why we're not pretty, thin, smart, witty or completely capable of anything we put our minds to.

STOP IT! Stop trying to convince everyone that you aren't FABULOUS. Stop hiding behind black 'slimming' clothing and spanx. Stop spreading rumours about how horrible you are. Stop bullying yourself. STOP IT!
In an effort to curb my negative inner monologue, I'm going to write one thing every day that makes me COMPLETELY AWESOME! Since it's mid October (btw, how the heck did that happen?!) I'll go to mid November. 30 days, 30 nice things about myself. Anyone want to join me on this mission?